Tuesday, January 19, 2010


Yesterday evening at the supermarket I witnessed one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.


Two brothers fighting over who gets to push the cart.

As Mom perused the canned green beans, Lucifer and Beelzebub were going at it like two Rottweilers fighting over a poodle bitch in heat. When the pushing turned into punching I glanced over at Mom to see what she plans to do to end the conflict before massive bloodshed. She looked over at me gave me a boys will be boys shrug and turned back to the buy one get one free Green Giant succotash.

I quickly left the aisle before I was struck with a badly aimed punch and could still hear the shouts from the beasts half way across the market.

The situation got me wondering, why do so few parents actually control their hellions anymore? I can’t even count the amount of times I have seen a toddler throw his or her body on the floor having a tantrum as Mommy stood by trying to rationalize with the monster. Or worse, offer them treats to bribe her way out of the situation. One woman went so far as to tell me it is a stage and he will grow out of it but for now, she is trying to teach him to “self comfort”. Have the brat “self comfort” in your overprices SUV so the rest of the world doesn’t have to hear it, you bitch.

These are the same parents that think it is perfectly reasonable to allow their spawn to run around a restaurant so the “adults” at the table can finish their own meals and talk. They are also the same parents that will sue the breadsticks out of Olive Garden when a waitress dumps a tray full of hot coffee on Damian because he ran straight into her.

I am far from a perfect parent but that shit didn’t fly with me. Due to my lack of ambition and culinary stills, my kids both learned to eat out politely from an early age. On the rare occasion they did experience a melt down and I left my gag and duct tape at home that day, I took them outside and reminded them just how much trouble they will be in if my entrĂ©e got cold.

Am I getting crankier in my old age or are these little shits more out of control than ever?

12 comments:

Doc said...

I think you are correct that they are getting worse and part of the reason may be that if a parent spanks their kid in public somebody wants to arrest them for assault... too damn p.c. sometimes!

Anonymous said...

I hear this all the time, and I totally agree. I just wonder why if everyone I know thinks this way how come there are still so many badass little kids running all over the fucking place?

Evil Twin's Wife said...

We have never allowed either of our children to get up from the table and run amok. We can take them both to fine dining places (like $200 a meal for 4) and they are angels - we get compliments from other diners. What is wrong with other parents????

The Dish said...

My parents NEVER would have tolerated that shit from either one of us kids. It drives me nuts!

Coffeypot said...

I saw a kid fall down and scream in, of all places, Wal-Mart. I restrained myself, but I wanted to pick him up my his belt, carry him to the bathroom and dunk his head a couple of times. Then tell him if he EVER pulls that shit again I'll let him go down the toilet - then flush it with his head just above the water for emphasis. Guess I won’t get Father of the Year Award!

Tgoette said...

Oh you are preachin' to the choir here, lady! More reason why certain people shouldn't be allowed to breed. Great post! I'm loving your stuff and started following. Thanks for visiting my page!

Jay said...

People don't want to stifle their little snowflakes' creativity and other new age mumbo-jumbo like that. If you impose a cart pushing system on them, they'll grow up to just fall in line when the Fascists take over. Or something like that.

Together We Save said...

Parents are letting their children run amuk... I don't think kids even know what the word NO means.

Sad but also scary to wonder what the world is becoming.

Christine said...

Jay is sadly so right. Crazy ass parents are so worried about the kids self esteem that they allow the little beasts to express themselves any way they want to.

Special K said...

It's not you. The world is chock full of entitlement bitches these days. They figure it is easier to give in than take the moment to correct. I know firsthand it is not easy and sometimes kids have their days despite our best efforts but the repeat offenders bug the shit out of me.

Special K said...

Well that and the world has made it an abolishment to spank. Good gravy, I am not in the least way violent or even spank my kids excessively and I was spanked. I don't know where they get their ideas from. When you had something to fear, you remembered what you were told and you behaved. It was a simple theory and it worked. Words do not bother kids, empty threats are figured out quickly that you aren't going to follow through. Why do parents tend to follow the insanity theory, repeating the same actions over and over expecting different results? We have a lot of things that work for us, and actually spanking is none of them but that is because I have grandkids and kids that knew one warning was it, we did what we said.

Christine said...

I never had to hit my kids to get them to behave. Just the "look" would scare the shit out of them enough to cut the crap. However, if a tantrum did occur, I would drag their little asses out leaving the cart behind. If my brats were stressing me out I didn't feel the need to spread the joy. I am by no means any type of expert on parenting but it seems to me if you let kids get away with shit, they will keep doing it.