Wednesday, May 20, 2009

I need to fire my current therapist. I have issues G-D damn it and at $150 bucks a week for a measly 45 minutes, I should be the most emotionally healthy bitch in Florida.

I don’t want to hear anymore of his :

“Blah, blah, set goals…”

“Don't dwell on blah blah…”

"We allow people to treat us badly blah blah ba blah..."

And the absolute worst is when I complain about why I keep doing the same stupid fucking things over and over:

"Blah blah why AREN'T you changing?"

Why aren’t I changing THERAPISTS is the real fucking question!

He is so damn inept that he doesn't even know all men are fucking selfish losers who are only after their own gratification at the expense of any dumb woman willing to give it.

How DARE he say I just make bad choices and shouldn't generalize!!

And then the bastard has the audacity to advise me to stop having unrelationships and attempt to find healthy relationships with emotionally healthy people.

As if any creature led by a penis could ever be emotionally healthy.

When I try to steer the conversation onto blaming my childhood for every fucked up thing I have ever done in my life...he even has a platitude about that...

" You are the architect of your destiny!"

Any day now I will hear "haste makes waste" and "a rolling stone gathers no moss".

Although I hate to admit it, he did say something fairly worthy this week...

"Now is the time to fix the next ten years"

It got me thinking, if I bump off SCM and get the charge knocked down to manslaughter, I could be out in about ten years.

Hmmmm...maybe I won't fire him afterall.


Bitchy McBitcherson said...

Get a good lawyer lined up now. Or a new therapist. Your call. Either one sounds beneficial to me! ;)

Anonymous said...

lmao...Well Put.

Libby said...

remember, you've got this totally emotionally healthy friend here in ohio to vouch for your sanity & well-being in front of the judge, when you snap!

razorbeck said...

Hey now I as a penis carrier I resent those remarks

regardless of how true they might be

namaste said...

was it your intention to have me LAUGHING AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE?!! this post was HILARIOUS!!!

umm... ahem, or was an entirely wrong response on my part?



coffeypot said...

Therapist don't know shit. They try to manuver your thinking around to what they think and to hell with what you really need. I say dump the doc, dump the dude in the house, spend some time to your self and then ventur out at your leasure and find a decent guy. I'm taken, of course, but there are others better than me out there - I think.

The Traveling Salesman said...

Holy moly! I may need to cut my Nah, I'll just blame you instead.

Hope your week improves.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Yep, time for a new therapist. Maybe a female therapist would be better?

The Girl You Don't Bring Home to Momma said...

Honey, many people go through many therapists until they find the right one. Hang in there. I see a woman and she's awesome.

Anonymous said...

Wow... $600 bucks a month... For that they better get in the trenches and FIX my life themselves... lol

Christine said...

I have tried women therapists and forgot that. They make me nutz with all that "feelings" shit. One actually used to say "use a FEELING word". OMG..

Anyway..the one I see now is a specialist in professional men going through mid life crisis. I kid you not but honestly, we really are on the same page on most things. I told him he needs to make his specialty more gender neutral. This is the 21st century.

Anonymous said...

I love it ! Very creative ! That's actually really cool Thanks.

donna said...