Tuesday, February 23, 2010



I have been proposed to four times in my life.

What does that mean?

Basically that there are four really stupid men in this world.

Two of them I married, one I considered marrying for about 2.3 seconds and the fourth I can't even remember his last name.    (I feel a little guilty about that one).

As much as I hate to admit it the days of bewitching men seem to be over for me.  I don't know many dudes that are seeking 40 something women with cottage cheese thighs and saggy boobs.  Even if they are 36 double D.

36 Double D at 30 is hot.  36 Double D at 40 means picking those baby's up off my stomach to strategically maneuver them into a breast reduction bra so I can button my blouse.

For a while I refused to admit I was no longer the hottest ticket in town.  SCM still thinks when I leave the house I have men following me around like the Pied Piper of Hamelin but the reality is, the only men that are following me are holding "Please give what you can. God Bless you" signs.

I guess it is time to trade my big girl panties for granny panties and admit to myself the future belongs to the hot young thangs with long hair, tramp stamps and low rise jeans.

Fucking whores.

15 comments:

noceleryplease said...

Absolutely not! Those little girls may have perky boobs, but they also have massive insecurities and don't even know who they are yet!

From what I hear, it's turning 50 that really rocks... because then it's all "look out world, I'm 50 now and I don't give a single shit what you think any more!"

Doc said...

I bettcha you know a few tricks that those 20somethings don't that make your man howl!!

(trust me I love the MILFs!)

Four Dinners said...

I can't remember how many times I've proposed.

Pretty much every night when I would say "I propose that you buy the next round"

Strangely, the girls in question invariably did!

Wifey claims I proposed to her on bended knee. I'm too frightened to admit I was so pissed I fell down on one knee accidentally...;-)

Anonymous said...

Get one of those bullet bras from the 50's and stick the girls right out fron so no one misses them.

I agree little girls are masses of annoying insecurities

3 Men and a Lady said...

I think saggy boobs bother us more than they do the guys. And hey, at least you were proposed to! Somehow I got married without a proposal. ? And no one says you have to trade in for granny panties... I never will!

Evil Twin's Wife said...

DD is hot at any age. The Evil Twin loves saggy hooters. I still wear string bikini undies and low rise jeans! LOL!

The Dish said...

I bet you are still the hottest broad around. I also think that as we get older our definition of beauty changes.

Karen said...

I resigned that I am no longer the hottest thing long ago. But I am still reeling in the young guys, so either they are stupid or...

Nah, they are just stupid.

Coffeypot said...

I don't want to marry ya, but I think your whole package makes you very desirable and HOT. Just saying.

Shiny Rod said...

Karen, shut your mouth. You still are hot to me! Ok, I'm back. Now about them boobs!

Robbie said...

Never give up your panties for Granny underware !!!!!!! Never ever ever ! And just for the record - I'm 36 and still getting my tramp stamp !

razorbeck said...

Hey Chris here is a simple sag test. Stand naked in front of a mirror if your nipple can still look at you above the knee its all good, if they stare at your feet intervention might be required

In either case send me pictures and I will give you my considered second opinion

glnroz said...

the little men in the white coats are gonna git you 'cause you're nuts.. lolol,, dont know how i got here but now I am worried,, lol

Anonymous said...

Just follow the trail of breadcrumbs GL, you'll find your way out.

Four Dinners said...

Saggy boobs????

I will not sleep tonight..