Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Short Blue Creatures and Tall Stupid Creatures.

Question:

Why have a had the theme song to the Smurfs running through my head all day? I haven't seen nor heard a smurf for years. But still, lalalalalala...round and round it goes.



Now you can have it too.

You'll beeeee smurrrrrrrfing sooooooooon. (insert evil laugh here)


SCM and I had a knock out drag out on Friday night.

Apparently in his confused little world, he thinks he actually contributes to the day to day things that need to be done to run a household.

Straightened that shit right out.

I don't mind keeping all the balls up in the air (his included) in order to have no expectations of a man who can barely manage wipe his own ass without assistance. However, I do expect said jerkwad to actually be aware that the only other adult in the household is frantically juggling all day and night.

When he expressed how tired he was after walking the dogs and putting in some laundry all my internal rules for keeping the peace went out the window.

"Blah, blah, rant, rant, didn't even fold the laundry, blah, rant, you don't do ANYTHING around here, rant rant, stay up all night chain smoking and looking at porn, bitch rant bitch, complaining whining piece of dogs shit..blah,rant, bitch.."

Doors slammed, engines revved and out to play with his pothead band buddies he went.

Whew, there must be an easier way to get rid of him. All that bitching was exhausting.

I received a text a few minutes later.....

"I suck".

Hmmmm, was he being sarcastic? Apologetic? Acknowledging his many faults?

Since I have yet to ask what he meant by that, I guess I truly don't give a marshmallow mallomar.

As long as he thinks twice about complaining again how tired he is, my work is done.

17 comments:

Bitchy McBitcherson said...

Let him have it. And yes he does sound like he does, indeed, suck.

As for the smurfs theme? It has been in my head because of Facebook. Apparently my smurf name is Drunk Smurf. Shocking, I know!

coffeypot said...

Maybe he's coming out of the closet. Confessing the only way he can to you. So how does it make you feel that you bitched a man to being gay?

Listen, if he is so bad why do you keep him around? A 9" tongue and being able to breath through his ears isn't a good enough reason to keep him around if you are that miserable. (In my opinion) I say, just shoot the fucker and blame it on his pothead friends.

GiGi said...

Sometimes, men have NO CLUE what to say to make things right. Sometimes, men just have NO CLUE what to say...at all. Off my hormonal pregnant woman soap-box, now....

Christine said...

CP; It is quite simple. I keep him around because he is out most nights until I am asleep and pays the utilities leaving me more money to buy shoes.

We all have our priorities. :-)

coffeypot said...

True!

razorbeck said...

LOL Chris I need to find some one to make my truck payment any ideas on where to look

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Remember that movie "The Burning Bed"? That's what I think about when I hear things like this or when the Evil Twin acts up. I think stabbity thoughts and then, I feel much better!

vinomom said...

I have a feeling you and I could talk for hours...
It's nice to know someone else has a dysfunctional relationship. Except I wouldn't put up with the pot.

Cst KO said...

I haven't heard this in a long time...lol

Olly said...

Sounds like SCM needs a little chore chart on the fridge. The reward for completing stuff would be the right to remain living with you!

The Girl You Don't Bring Home to Momma said...

Wow, I'm exhausted from it. Your right, there must be a better way. When you find it, let me know.

Special K said...

After reading Coffey's answer I can't stop giggling! I like that one!

Libby said...

lol @ evil twin's wife for the phrase "stabbity thoughts"!! OMG, that's priceless! I'll laugh every time I think it!

M Chickk said...

I didn't even have to listen to the video, all I had to do was read the lalalalalala...and it was stuck in my head. I cant wait until my sister gets here for dinner tonight so I can do the same to her.

Alex said...

That sounds exactly like an argument Tim and I had a month or so ago!

He had to keep both kids home by himself today (sick) on his day off and he about tore his hair out.

Why yes, dear, the ARE always that annoying. So nice of you to take notice instead of dozing in the chair.

hehe. I love my husband, but there are times that I want to run screaming ino the night. Leaving him with the kids, of course.

Lindi said...

I miss your old blog, too bad SCM had to find it.

He sounds like a pathetic character, but there must be good in him somewhere or you wouldn't have stayed with him this long.

Your old blog used to make me see that my hubby really wasn't bad at all.

Golden To Silver Val said...

My ex used to purposely pick a fight with me so he could slam out of the house and go play pool at the local watering hole with his rocket scientist friends. Sigh..... what an effing idiot. I, too, was glad to have him leave. After a while I fixed it so he never had to come back. LOLOLOLOLOLOL I aim to please.