Thursday, February 21, 2008

It's Thursday Already



I have no date for Friday or Saturday night. Big freakin' surprise.

I simply do not understand why there are not rich and attractive men banging....

on my DOOR.

Okay, yeah, on that too.

I continue to peruse dating sights like plentyoffish.com and match.com for my prince charming.

I was looking at Craigslist but decided that I really don't want to be tied up and flogged with spaghetti by some married man.

Although, perhaps I am being too selective. I mean, maybe I could take a doggy bag of pasta home for the next day lunch.

Since I am a wise ass, of course I had to respond to some of the more outrageous Craigslist ads with one simple sentence...

What's in it for me?

Evidentially, what I am in for is as follows.......

A BIG dick baby... (yes I am sure he is)

I will eat your ----- out for hours. (Believe me, if I have time to lay in bed for hours, I am taking a fucking nap)

Nothing too dangerous or too painful. ( Whew...what a relief. I hate scarring.)

I want to pound out that tught pretty kitty all night long. (I think fluffy would prefer a good scratching and a bowl of milk)

Looking for NSA fun (Do I even want to know what NSA is?)

and the most confusing to date...

A french lesson would be fine, more if you are interested.



Is it possible that men still don't know how to work their way into a woman's bed?


There was not one offer to clean out my garage, change my oil or mow my lawn.








6 comments:

razorbeck said...

I am sure it really is not news to you but NSA stands for No Strings Attached of fuckem and forgetum.

I love some of the responses to your rather innocent querry, does that shit actually work on some women and how do I get a craigslist account?

Christine said...

Ahhh, NSA= No strings attached! got it.

Thanks hon..

Coffeypot said...

Thanks for the invite, Chritine. I'll be back. Stop by my place anytime, too.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for inviting me back into your world. Getting out of mine just a few minutes a day is nice. REAL NICE! BTW I have now moved also. I WAS Squirrel now I am Renee' http://adhdstepson.blogspot.com/

Burfica said...

whooohooo thank you for the invite. I know, why can't men just clean the house, I would be his sex slave for a long time if he would just lift a finger to clean. hehehehehe

Special K said...

Well are these...clean out my garage, change my oil or mow my lawn..some kind of freaky sex code? Because a couple of them are kinda turnin' me on.

Glad to see you back. Can't believe he finally found it. Thanks for the invite, I have missed you!