Saturday, July 26, 2008




When I think of vacation, I tend to imagine five star accommodations, room service, gourmet meals, shopping, museums, maybe a play or two. Sometimes I think of a luxury cruise with stewards and waiters to do my bidding.


Tennessee Smoky Mountains? Not so much.


But that was the plan devised by the family with a shrug and whatever by me.


Whatever indeed.


What I was not considering at the time was that:


1. It is July.

2. Mountains involve hiking.

3. Mountains go up.


I spent most of the vacation waving and saying God Bless.


The rented "cabin" was nice. The only thing cabin about it was that it was made of wood and was unpainted. We all had king sized beds and private commodes. I was able to rough my way through that with nary a complaint.


They did convince me to go white water rafting which was more like stagnant creek pushing. There is currently a drought in Tennessee and the rocks that usually lay unnoticed at the bottom, are now part of an obstacle course. Oh, don't get me wrong, we still had to paddle our asses off to get around said rocks. Which of course led to painful arms and shoulders.


So here I am. Done with vacation. All my nails are broken, my arms, legs and shoulders hurt and I have a sunburn.


Next time Club Fucking Med.







14 comments:

razorbeck said...

sounds like you need to take a nice restive break from your vacation lol

Karen said...

I am with you on definition of vacation. I don't want to hike, bike, climb, etc. I like the beach, a cabana boy, and room service.

Jay said...

The Smoky Mountains are beautiful, but vacation to me is either Vegas or the beach. Man I wish Vegas had a beach, it would be perfect. ;-)

Doc said...

Sounds like you need a vacation from yoru vacation.

Knight said...

Climbing does not ever a vacation make. People are crazy. That is more like marathon training.

Matt-Man said...

I am with ya on that. I want to be somewhere where I can sit on my ass, and do nothing but drink, relax, and enjoy the scenery. Cheers!!

WomensDaily said...

I couldn't do something that outdoorsy for a vacation. It seems more like work in itself.

coffeypot said...

You had a private privy? Gawd, you must be one of them there rich bitches. Which catalog did you use to wipe with?

OneHungMan said...

Tennessee in July doesn't sound all that great...maybe an Alaskan cruise would have been nice.

Olly said...

No vacation needs to include hiking or tenting (yuk).
I'm liking Karen's idea of a cabana boy though...

Marilyn said...

Wow. I guess we just have to agree to disagree about this because it sounded like a pretty tame vacation to me. I much prefer going where there are no people. I'm antisocial that way.

Burfica said...

yeah I don't like vacations you need to recuperate from.

Special K said...

I just got back from vacation and now I need a real one to relax from that one!
I am only 6 hours from the Smokey Mountains! Not far enough away to be my vacation but they are beautiful!

Alekx said...

I'm thinking cabana boys with big muscles, skimpy cloths, feather fans, cold drinks and a whatever you want my queen attitude.

sorry was in my own world there for a minute.