Tuesday, July 27, 2010

My New Mentor

I was thrilled to find this terrific advice on writing and I thought I would share it.


HOW TO WRITE GOOD


by Frank L. Visco

My several years in the word game have learnt me several rules:
  1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
  2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
  3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
  4. Employ the vernacular.
  5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
  6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
  7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
  8. Contractions aren't necessary.
  9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
  10. One should never generalize.
  11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
  12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
  13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
  14. Profanity sucks.
  15. Be more or less specific.
  16. Understatement is always best.
  17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
  18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
  19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
  20. The passive voice is to be avoided.
  21. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
  22. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
  23. Who needs rhetorical questions?

8 comments:

Doc said...

Hilarious.. Love IT!

Coffeypot said...

Now that is funny & will be stolen (like a piece of bacon at Wait Watchers meeting) and sent out 'as soon as possible.'

吳怡君吳怡君 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it.......................................................................

Special K said...

Now that was hilarious! I am afraid I break nearly every rule.

Libby said...

hilarious!

黃怡張華樺張華樺妹 said...

好看耶~一定每天有空給你支持............................................................

Libby said...

...so now your smart en ken right, huh?

麗王王珠 said...

老天爺賦予了強者的能力,就是要他比弱者多擔待..................................................