Tramp Stamps and Whale Tails

and lions and tigers and bears. Oh, my.

I am a hypocrite.

My attitude towards the world is live and let live..god bless....do unto others and knock yourself out.

Except please try to show a little class while you do whatever the fuck you want to do.

I took the kid to Dennys for our weekly ritual junk breakfast before school and was treated to a lovely view of the ass of the gal at the adjoining table the entire meal.

What amazed me is not only was she totally unabashed by her butt being on display, she offered it purposefully.

To show off her ass in her low rise jeans, purple whale tail and her tramp stamp.

At 7am.

In Dennys.

I totally get wanting to attract men and being half naked is certainly the way to do it. The construction workers and UPS guy were certainly enjoying the view unless they actually needed to go back and forth to the restroom four times each. However, it was fucking Dennys in the morning!

Always willing to research oddities for the benefit of all man kind, I quickly assessed whether Bambi was perhaps a leftover from the clubs last night.

You know the look...the finger brushed hair and the rumbled clothes from being on the floor all night after wastedly falling into bed with a stranger.

I mean not that I personally would know anything about that kind of thing.

Of course not.

Nope, this little gal was showered , spiffy and ready to start her day.

I hushed my kid who was babbling about something unimportant such as failing math or a school bully and tried to tune into the conversation going on at the next table.

Where was Bambi headed in that attire?

Her breakfast companion was a fully dressed young lady about the same age who fucking mumbled! The bitch.

Shit, I really need to learn how to read lips.

The best I could get was that they were indeed off to work after their nine cups of coffee and Asscrack was adamant about not taking any shit off the boss that day.

Okay kids, so tell me, what line of work permits employees to dress a perfect 10 on the Slut-O-Meter with normal work hours that doesn't involve a pimp?

I am at a loss.